Sleep

I like to sleep, well the idea of sleep. Preparing and planning for hours of nothingness, restoration, if you will. The set ritual followed by the thought of sleep. The comfort of my duvet and blankets piling on top of my body as if trying to disappear. The act of closing one’s eyes after being so... Continue Reading →

Spilling out p.1

My mind is all messed up and confused. Due to all things of life it has caused me to feel and think all confusing things in which I am a hypocrite of myself. I know the way people look at me, I look at me like that too. I’m fat and chubby in all the... Continue Reading →

Useless

I'm sure I had a purpose once, well I think that's what that feeling of hope was. Now I lay here lifeless and useless, unaware of the blur of life, filled with an abundant prolific amount of pain. I'm sure I had a purpose once, well I think that's what that feeling of hope was.... Continue Reading →

Stuck

Stuck, I am drowning. I am still. I can’t breathe. I am screaming for help. All of this internal. No one hears me. Is this how everyone feels? Then the demons come back again. It must be how everyone feels. Or…I am not ‘normal’.  I am forced to hide the feelings. With a convincing mask.... Continue Reading →

Giving up

Darkness, overpowering, forced to bow down. Light is blinding. Emotion, unknown. Confusion consumes me. Yet nothing is apparent. Everything is fine. But inside unpleasant. Nothing is fine. Stomach drops. Nothing’s changed. Heart palpitations.Too much for my liking. Breathing too much. Yet starving for air. Staring into space. To find any answers. Now I see it... Continue Reading →

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